Ukraine

"Nationalism... is like cheap cheap alcohol. First it makes you drunk, then it makes you blind, then it kills you"    -Dan Fried

What a media frenzy has surrounded the events of the past few months in Ukraine. I was recently asked by an elderly Russian man what I thought of this conflict, to which I could only reply that no one is ever all right, and no one is ever all wrong. In the following post I will try and explain the situation as best I can, with a conscious effort to be clear and concise.

As countries go, Ukraine doesn't have much history of being an actual nation or people. It has been slavic for a long time, but before that Scythian, Kazar and other nomadic stock from Central Asia. During the Russian Civil War/Revolution one of my favorite historical characters, Nestor Makhno, managed to make some serious headway against authoritarianism by setting up a free area in which no one was allowed to impose their ideology on anyone else.

Of course, the Red Army eventually overwhelmed them by sheer numbers and ruthlessness, and the area was turned into the Ukrainian SSR. When Stalin decided to experiment with agricultural production in the 1930's millions of Ukrainians died of starvation in what is known as the Holodomor. Things didn't get much better during the next decade with the Nazis rampaging throughout the region slaughtering more millions.

Once it was over though the Soviet shot callers in Moscow decided to make like old school Imperialists, get their pens out, and start drawing borders. The result was the country we now call Ukraine.



Starting with the Orange Revolution in 2004 the country has seen a lot of tension between the east and west. The east is relatively industrialized and does a lot of trade with Russia and the CIS countries, whereas the west is more agricultural and exports primarily to Europe. In addition to this division, the west speaks Ukrainian in addition to Russian and has lately seen a lot of nationalism based on this fact.

Now I feel like I can discuss what is currently happening.

The imprisoned Yulia Tymoshenko used her considerable wealth acquired during her time as Prime Minister to pay people to go into the Maiden and oppose the government of her foe, Viktor Yanukovych. The gambit worked, at least for her, and she was released.

What led Tymoshenko to believe that the moment to mobilize forces had come was that Yanukovych had decided to sign an economic deal with Russia that would have done a lot to relieve Ukraines ruinous economy. Unfortunately for him and Ukraine, the EU concluded that doing so meant that they couldn't have similar trade deals with them. Viktor, for all his many faults, made the logical economic choice and chose Russia over an IMF loan that would have led to austerity that would have ruined him politically.

He then decided to use force to drive out the people who were being used against him, which led to people voluntarily joining the protests and things spiralled out of control until he fled the country and an unelected Ukrainian nationalist government was installed with the blessing of the West and a lot of positive coverage in the press.

The first act of this government was to remove Russian as an official language, which is pretty stupid considering its the only language all Ukrainians can speak. Naturally a lot of Russian speaking people in the country took offense to this and with support from Russia have started to fragment the country in retaliation.

Due to some truly impressive corruption the once mighty military of the Ukraine has been reduced to a shadow of its former self and is in no position to oppose anything or anyone militarily. Add this to the fact that a fairly sizable contingent in the new government is openly Fascist and anti-semitic, you have yourself a proper political tinderbox.

Russia has put up with a lot of shit from the West since the end of the Soviet era (the bombing of Serbia, NATO expansion into Eastern Europe, the invasion and occupation of Afghanistan and Iraq) but having a partially fascist government on its borders was too much.

Consequently, Putin did what most Russians thought was right and started taking action to topple the new government in Kiev. Then you got America once again getting involved in political feuds on the other side of the planet and things get even more volatile.

Where it will go from here is hard to predict. Best case scenario in my opinion is that the country will allow a plebiscite region by region, with those choosing Russia being allowed to peacefully integrate. Another option would be to hold snap elections and hope that some sort of a unity government is formed that is strong enough to weather the economic shitstorm that will be the foreseeable future of the country. If they are lucky Russia will still offer them the deal given to Yanukovych and the EU will stop being dicks about them having concurrent deals with them.

This is of course just all my opinion, and as such, is fundamentally the product of my own bias. I wish the people of the region the best possible outcome and hope that violence can be avoided.

Berlin

Way back in the 15th Century an ambitious bunch of megalomaniacs using the familial name Hohenzollern began to transform a series of towns into a city and raise armies in order to establish an Empire. They were a temperamental, organized and determined crew, but they fit in pretty well with the other inbred sadists masquerading as divinely ordained nobility of the day.

The city of Berlin that they founded and resided in for centuries has had a turbulent time during its five centuries. Some of the more dramatic phases were-

Losing half its population due to the horrendous war caused by the protestant reformation, seeing armies come and go for 30 blood drenched years.

Becoming a center of religious tolerance during a time when that wasn't common in Europe, leading to a mental blooming of brilliance on par with any other.

Prussian Armies marshaled here under the Hohenzollern banner unify Germany in a daring and dashing campaign that forged a nation; not to mention being the first modern military campaign.

The city was a cultural orgy during the Roaring 20's and at that time one of the largest cities earth had ever had on its surface.

As the epicenter of the Nazi Reich, the city saw many monumental building projects, most of which were promptly blown to smithereens.

The population was compelled to hide underground like moles for a few years as English speaking Valkyries perfected the murderous art of aerial bombing.

When the Russians finally made it to the gates of the city, an apocalyptic battle took place involving millions of men and thousands of tanks- arguably the biggest brouhaha of all time.

Following the devastation the city was divided militarily in half with the occasional tank standoff and soldier or civilian dying at the fortified border between east and west. Premier Khrushchev once said, "Berlin is the testicle of the West. When I want the West to scream, I squeeze Berlin."

Once all this drama was over the city of Berlin was a living breathing historical mutant. Too strange to be copied and too rare to ignore. Its most recent phase is decidedly less violent, but every bit as captivating.

Today Berlin has a staggering 890 square kilometers of urban forests, parks and other green space (they alone are almost 9 times the size of Paris), making it the least city like metropolis in the world. The late Kaisers hoped it would become the greatest city of all time and thus designed it on a plan that would theoretically accommodate 30 million people. This probably would have happened too if Wilhelm II and/or Adolf Hitler hadn't been such insatiable savages. I however am glad it only ended up housing a mere 3.4 million, for this has made it a spacious and livable place.

I ended up living in the 8th borough, Neukoelln, during most of my stay here. Ironically, this is firmly in what was once the American sector of the city, and today is half populated by people who are not ethnically German; primarily Turks, Arabs and Kurds. It is a lively and sometimes gritty, but also frequently peaceful and picturesque part of the city that I have learned to love in a way I never expected to love any urban setting.

I recently found out that the castle like fortress/barracks that I frequently ride my bike past once housed the armies of the Prussian Kaisers and then was the Gestapo headquarters in which the Final Solution was plotted and perpetrated. This happens to be right next to the decommissioned Tempelhof airport used in the Berlin Airlift and which is now the biggest park I've ever seen. In a typically Berlin drama the place was planned to be sold and developed after it was closed in 2008, then it was promptly squatted, then the city decided to open up to the public, when some developers talked them into letting them build some shit, the public got pissed off at this, and then the city voted to keep it as it is. 

For me it will always be the city that fostered the brains of Humboldt, Hegel and Marx. The streets that witnessed the dastardly murder of Rosa Luxemburg, Karl Liebknecht and their Spartacist brethren. My neighborhood that once saw political street battles led by the likes of Olga Benario as Commuinsts desperately fought the spread of Fascism street by street and brain by brain.

A place of Anarchist squats, spectacular museums, utterly distinct neighborhoods, unsurpassed nightlife, more cultural diversity than you can shake a consciousness at and so much nature that you can easily forget concrete chaos any time you want. A city in which Communism and Capitalism smashed into each other at great historical velocity, and some how came out the better for it.

I think Jean Paul was right when he said some time ago that "Berlin is rather a part of the world than a city." David Bowie was perhaps even more correct when he commented that Berlin is "The greatest cultural extravaganza that one could imagine."

I feel truly honored to have been able to call it my home for part of my life and hope to return many times to see what this sprawling mosaic of humanity is up to.